Tip of The Week: Nature Meditation

What do you see? Pexels.com
Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.
Lao Tzu

Nature does nothing in vain.

Come forth into the light of things, let nature be your teacher.
William Wordsworth

Meditation can mean a million possibilities depending on where you live , your Philosophy and many other ideas. The process can either be personal , guided or with a group in any position or length of time. The english root of the word comes from the Latin and French word meditacioun and meditacion. The word conveys the ideas thought, reflection, study and think over, consider. Interesting how a French Monk Guigo II in his religious works Jacobs Ladder the word meditation is used in connection with Prayer and higher consciousness. http://faithandenterprise.org/lectio-divina-and-guigos-ladder-for-monks describes following:

Lectio Divina’s Four Steps

Guigo’s four steps can be understood as follows:

Reading (Lectio): The passage of scripture is read in its literal or natural sense, without applying theological or historical presuppositions.

Meditating (Meditatio): By meditation, Guigo meant to ponder the passage and consider its lessons and meaning for our lives.  This is different from what we usually think of as meditation and is a more analytical process.  The analysis is not, however, focused on issues of historicity or dogma but rather on the meaning of the passage for the participant.

Prayer (Oratio): In this step, we set aside the analysis and the cognitive activity of the second step and turn to God in prayer.  Ideally the second stage will have informed our prayer in some manner, leading us to ask for guidance, resolution, or perhaps something else.  By turning our attention towards God, and listening, this step also prepares us for the final stage.

Contemplation (Contemplatio): In this stage we let go of all thoughts and images and just rest in God.

There are many other historical references to meditation and the most famous in the west is Buddhist. In essence meditation practices have been around for thousands of years and it has been an international practice.

Today in this technological society it is emerging a new practice for many even Lady Gaga the extravagant Pop star embraces a form of it. I endeavour to use different types of meditation in my life through out the week. One type I really benefit from what I call Nature meditation.

How I Practice it

1 Find a comfortable chair with the ability of watching and observing nature.

2 Focus all your attention on what you can see and remove all distracting thoughts.

3 Let the mind soak in all the sounds , sights , smells and sensations with no judgements.

5 After 10 or more minutes ask yourself a few questions

What can I see

What can I learn?

What does this experience teach me?

Here are a few lessons I have learnt during these splendid opportunities

I was watching the sky with white fluffy clouds passing by during a sunny day. At times the clouds would block the sun then after a while the sun will shine again on my face with radiant warmth. The lesson I learnt in our world we have cloudy or dull days but the constant inner joy of our sun will radiate when then the challenges or stresses float by. The real joy we have is a constant sun from our heart but challenges like clouds stop the the inner joy shinning out just temporarily.

Another occasion I was watching the birds , observing the trees and thinking of all natures wonders. Not one of them was asking anything from me as a spectator. The trees give us clean oxygen , fruit and wood but what do I give back in return. Nature for thousands of years like a caring mother looks after the sons and daughter of earth. The lesson what do I give back to society not asking for anything back in return. Being in touch with nature can revive the soul to live a refreshing life away from the hustle and bustle of modern life.

Tip of the Week



When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps Cofucius

Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment Jim Rohn

Life can be pulled by goals just as surely as it can be pushed by drives Victor E Frankl

The ideal of playing any team sports without goals would probably take the incentive and fun out of the game. In a similar fashion life would lack incentives and fun if there was no focus or meaning to our life without goals. Victor E Frankl a neurologist and Psychiatrist who survived the holocaust survivor is an inspiring character. He had experienced life through the worst conditions possibles to the mundane activities of life in peace time. His research on humanity meaning and drives is a catalyst for a person purpose in life. In reflection on considering his ethos with work and experience goals helped him to survive then thrive.

Jim John is one of my favourite speakers and his speeches flowed with so much insight about life and challenges. He was a farm boy who eventually inspired millions to take action by his workshops and seminars. His practical advice on working on oneself to achieve the life you want with one key component was goals.

Confucius had a huge impact on Chinese culture and other Asian Cultures. He was influencing the attitude and the process of life in society. A large part of his teachings was rituals in simplistic methodical systems to enrich lives of all. By pursuing the enlightenment of many his focus was a system of educating others from the farmer to Government officials.

Excerpt from the Analects:
When Confucius was traveling to Wei, Ran Yu drove him.
Confucius observed, “What a dense population!” Ran Yu said, “The people having grown so numerous, what next should be done for them?”
“Enrich them,” was the reply. “And when one has enriched them, what next should be done?” Confucius said, “Educate them.”

Achievable Goals

1 Daily goals

Set 3 simple goals, I call them intentions at start of the day.

2 Weekly goals

Set various goals, the secret is not to have too many

3 Monthly goals

Set intermittent goals to supplement and support weekly and daily goals

4 Yearly goals

Bigger projects but again not too many large endeavours

5 5 Year goals

Where would you want be in 5 years

Stages of life goals




Personal Development

Life goals or Bucket list



  hours  minutes  seconds


Set a goal now!

Set goal before the New year 2021 Pexels.com

Ambition and Greed of religious and monarchy creeds

New adventures of the Musketeers 

Part 3

D`Artagnan came into the banquet room dancing around like a monkey at a circus he obviously had too much to drink. The intoxicated Musketeer was dinning below his station. “ D`Artagnan you fool come and sit down here” Athos grabbed his arm and persuaded the young fool to sit next to him away from the other guest.” What are you doing you incompetent fool. Do you not know this is a special occasion for our dear friend Porthos tonight”. D`Artagnan just looked at Athos in silence but he had a glow about his countenance. His whole body was alive despite being under the influence of alcohol. He was under the influence of a mysterious invisible potion that nobody in the room had taken. His eyes were alive, and his heart was beating slightly faster than usual. Athos being prudent and articulate in his choice of words and perceived D`Artagnan was smitten by the potion of love. “Who is it D`Artagnan , what is her name?” D`Artagnan gazed across the room to one of the servants attending to one of the other guest. Athos looked across the room and noticed a young maiden who had long blonde hair. Athos said to D`Artagnan in a angry voice “You don’t even know the girl, stop this infatuation and come to your senses”.

Mean while some of the distinguished guest were talking about the civil unrest in Paris with the heavy taxes being increased.Jean-Baptise Colbert France chief finance minister was trying to save the country insatiable appetite for war and dominance of religious freedom that cause a deficit in the economy. Marazin was proving to be unpopular even with the aristocracy with his cunning devious plans to manipulate the seat of government by his edicts. France had become for the Pope a vision of an extended Holy Roman empire leading the way for the rest of Europe. The Kingdom of France was in the power of the Cardinal and his lover the Queen regent. Despite the nations internal conflicts the banquet at Porthos home was going well with the servants busily seeing to the needs of the guest.

Aramis was engaged in deep conversation with François VI de La Rochefoucauld a distinguished gentleman who knew 

Madame de Chevreuse who were both acquaintances of the Queen. Aramis said to Francois “how do you know Madame de Chevreuse?” The noble replied in a charismatic tone” My dear fellow I met her first in 1618 at the Palace as a superintendent of the household of Louis XIII’s queen. She is an inspiring woman full of vigour and vim a patron for the French people and nation”. Aramis knew this noble woman but the secret liaison they had  was unlawful as she was a married woman. She inspired his heart to fight for France after the failure of his dream of being a priest. The church stole Aramis heart and soul after the conspiracy of a bishop and a kings officer couldn’t liaise with the Cardinal hypocrisy. Aramis was ruled by his passionate heart either a love for God , country or a mistress. Despite his emotional outburst he still had genuine ethics following the love of his saviour. Aramis knew about the corruption of the church and Kings embezzlement of Frances resources. He had empathy for the common man and woman of France defending their right to be heard.

Love was intoxicating D`Artagnan despite Athos careful and watchful eye on both. “ Thats it D`Artagnan I’m going over to that young maiden to warn of her of your incorrigible behaviour”. Athos walked over to the young maiden seeking an opportunity to speak to her in private. “ Can I speak to you privately for a minute please?”. “What is it Sir? Can I get you and your friend another drink?” Athos said in a fatherly but kind voice” That fool has had too much to drink already , I just want to warn you of his conniving advances”. Sommer looked at Athos with affection and said” Thank you very much for your considerations. I use to have brother who was like him and he reminds me of him with his foolish antics”. Athos smiled at the young maiden and said you are very beautiful, you remind me of someone, I’m not sue who. Where is your brother now? Sommer had a tear in her eye as she looked away in shame of her grief. “ He is dead sir” she said very softly. Athos mind then went into synchronisation mode. He had two conflicting emotions enveloped with bewilderment. In sheer desperation of disbelief he asked the question “ Was his name Blaise?”

to be continued










What lens are you using

How we see the world is totally different for everyone. We call this perspective on how we perceive the world around us. One of my favourite periods in history is the renaissance. Some of the greatest art pieces linear perspective was used to give the viewer a more accurate picture of what was seen by the naked eye. One website explained it simply this way”the artist has to imagine the canvas as an “open window” through which he sees the subject of the painting. In this open window it is necessary to draw straight lines to represent the horizon, divide the painting with different horizontal lines and fix the vanishing point. The vanishing point is usually located near the centre of the horizon. From this point it is necessary to draw the so-called “visual rays” that connect the viewer’s eye with the point in the distance. These lines helped artists find the prospective points of the canvas thanks to their intersection with the horizontal lines. Generally, an artist use visual rays to align the edges of the walls and flooring.”

In Psychology there are many different theories on person perspective including

Behaviorist Perspective

Psychodynamic Perspective

Humanistic Perspective

Cognitive Perspective

The latest perspective I have been reading about and is very complicated quantum Physics perspective. I love science and Psychology and many other fields but this new insight or perspective is definitely new angle for my mind to comprehend and to understand.

In conclusion on this brief post here are a few reflections.

When you have a disagreement you both could be right or wrong depends on what perspective you or the other person was coming from.

When things go wrong or not what you expected look again from a different perspective it might be a blessing or lesson.

Before making any choices or decisions look at the situation from a different perspective.

I believe everyone should have a broad picture of how the universe operates and our place in it. It is a basic human desire. And it also puts our worries in perspective. Stephen Hawking

Emotional adjustment theory of change

Cycle of emotional change

I am working on a theory of emotional cycle of change. This is a simplistic model help children and adults understand their emotions more clearly. I have read many theories and papers , books etc but most are too complicated for the average person. I am a visual learner and through my investigation I will endeavour to inform the reader in everyday language easily assimilated.

When you are in an emotional change or adjustment it’s hard to focus on details and constructs of theory. The biggest problem me and my children had to understand when my wife and their mother died of cancer was not her situation but what was going on internally for us. We all face adjustments in life and the best insight that helped me is the the simple truths not the complicated ideologies.

Tip of the week

You only have one pair of hands

Many hands make light work. Don’t be afraid to delegate

As a fiercely independent person this is one of weaknesses. As I grow in insight there is close correlation between two opposites. A strength can be a weakness at times and the weakness can be a gift. Reflection is the key to understand ourselves and the universe.

Reflecting on my week one of my greatest strengths has lead me to two questions. How could of I done a better job? How can I make this job or process easier?

I used to volunteer for a massive organisation and my favourite word at the time was delegate. Running large departments and having optimum performance and safety was important. There was no way one individual can manage or organise a large group of people especially when the numbers ran into thousands.

The prophet Moses lead the Jews out of Egypt with his right hand man Aaron who was the negotiator. Moses realised he needed help to organise the millions to be successful so he did.

There are many psychological reasons why people don’t ask for help. Here are a few that you might identify with

1 I am independent and I never ask for help because I can do a better job and guaranteed the job will get done.

2 Believe no one does anything for nothing

3 Everyone has busy lives they have too much to do already.

4 Fear of rejection, I have asked before and I was let down.

5 Feel incompetent asking for help.

6 Too proud

7 Too shy

These are just few reasons what might stop us from asking for that helping hand. Challenge your thinking and reasons of not asking and when you start asking you will have might of Made the job easier. Might do a better job with a few different perspectives with different talents. We only have so much Time , energy and resources .

Many voices can speak a louder message

Feelings of a Psychopath

What do you feel? Pexels.com

There are a million questions you could ask a Psychopath if the opportunity availed itself. The core issues from many therapist perspective they would be intrigued to know: What feelings and emotional states do they have. This post will be an investigation on how they precieve their own feelings and the feelings of others. At this juncture I will add: Every individual has different perspectives including Psychopaths. Similar to the Autistic spectrum there is different degrees and performances of behaviours. I believe that all humanity is on the autistic spectrum at some level, maybe this could be a question for another post. Psychopaths major attributes can range from extraversion to conscientiouness that needs to be underpinned by some emotional contagion. From a previous post I discussed the lack of empathy as one characteristic but there are many individuals who lack awareness and emotional intelligence that shadows lack of empathy but I wouldn’t call them Psychopaths.

One research paper said Psychopaths  show little arousal to others’ distress. Juveniles with psychopathic tendencies and high callous unemotional traits may very well understand the emotional state of others without “sharing” their feelings. The research went on to say why? This signal may be lacking in these individuals, as it is already established with adult psychopaths who exhibit weaker psychophysiological reactions to emotional stimuli and poor passive avoidance learning.

We learn our emotional cues from our caregivers as children. The old classical theory was taught we are born with emotions but that is not totally correct. There is more information in a past blog “What are emotions?” and more insight in my book “What are you Afraid of?” Simply explained we learn our emotional intelligence from parents as children and other factors. The problem with childhood learning is: What if both parents were emotionally illertate or even more deliberating one parent was a narcissist.

There is a unhealthy relationship between parent and child called enmeshment, The definition according to American Psychological Association “a condition in which two or more people, typically family members, are involved in each other’s activities and personal relationships to an excessive degree, thus limiting or precluding healthy interaction and compromising individual autonomy and identity“.

Narcissistic parent can enmesh the child emotional growth with tragic consequences leading to the possibilities of a Psychopath home grown. One resource said Individuals high on psychopathic personality had experienced higher levels of childhood neglect and/or abuse compared to those low on psychopathic personality. I would include in that statement emotional stability.

One research paper mentions a significant point on Psychopaths personality traits likely play an important role in how Emotional Intelligence (EI) is expressed across a range of interpersonal interactions. The observed associations between psychopathic traits and strategic EI suggests that further research on how personality traits influence the use and management of emotional information.

During my research for this post came across interesting article with a Psychopath who gives candid response to personal questions. He said People think we have no emotion, which is absolutely not true. We just feel them but turned down. If most people feel an emotion between seven and eight on a dial of ten, I feel it between zero and two. Negative emotions are background noise. We can’t tune into that frequency because our brains just don’t process enough information for them to ever be loud enough to feel or direct behavior. We enjoy things, get excited about things, like adrenaline — that’s great.

In conclusion to reflect on this subject with further investigation Napoleon Bonaparte said

Great ambition is the passion of a great character. Those endowed with it may perform very good or very bad acts. All depends on the principles which direct them.









Ambition and Greed of religious and monarchy creeds

New adventures of the Musketeers

Part two

Porthos stopped what he was doing instantly and said to Sommer the young maiden “Quickly come with me into my office”. At the same time Porthos commanded Mousequeton his servant that no one to disturb him and young Sommer in his office. “Sit down their my young maiden while I will pour myself a stiff drink”. The young maiden sat down and started to shake out of fear of reprisals from her secret. Porthos could see she was frightened like a small shrew scampering in the long grassy meadows.

“Are you bloody joking Sommer about your grandfather , it wasn’t that terrible red dragon. I’m sorry I forgot he was your relative , I didn’t mean to splurge it out. Your grandfather has caused so much misery for my dear friend Athos and my pain just came out in anger then, please forgive Sommer it is not you I am angry with”. Sommer looked relieve knowing his anger wasn’t directed to her. She knew the musketeers were experts with the sword and if they wanted they could kill with just one swoop of the sword before the enemy had time to think about it. Porthos waited for a while in silence as he composed himself after gulping down a shot of his strong drink.

“So what has happened to your mother? Do you know who it is?” Porthos said in a fatherly tone. “Yes her name was Catherine”. Porthos was speechless but in his mind he was having a private conversation with himself. The dialogue was between the rational Porthos and the emotional Porthos in his head. The rational Porthos said “Is this the same mother Athos lover the Italian flower who bore him a son called Blaise?” While the emotional Porthos said “Oh no that can’t be true“ Sommer noticed Porthos was confused by his eyes looking right then left and moving his arms opposite to each other with a puzzled face. The young maiden started to cry and and a torrent of tears came flooding down her succulent cheeks past her bright red lips bouncing off her narrow chin. Porthos knew those tears were for her mother Catherine because the flow of them reflected the pain from within her heart of the bond they had. Porthos in warm gentle fatherly manner looked upon her sadness and felt the tears well up in his eyes and his heart started to swell for Sommer sadness. He watched her quietly as she bathed in a shower of her sadness as the tears washed her long blonde hair. There was nothing Porthos could do or say because he knew pain had to make its mark on the soul of the young maiden as he watched her embracing her pain with his heart.

Eventually Sommer started to compose herself and apologised to Porthos for all the inconvenience she has caused him especially on this special banquet he was organising. “The tears of a sweet maiden are more important to me than the frivolous chatter of drunken fools my poor girl” said Porthos in a consoling tone. “You are so kind and understanding my lord , I wish all men where compassionate like you”. My dear maiden the secret of compassion is first to be compassionate to yourself. Only you know within that understands the pains and joys of life by embracing the inner soul of self. When I feel for the young Porthos who has seen the anguish of his mother and the shame of the young Porthos father. Reflecting on how the inner young child feels at times I give that child compassion. We are all human Sommer and the inner souls we carry are the reflection of humanity.

Sommer was listening to every word as new dawn of inspiration filled her heart with a flow of compassionate knowledge embracing her inner soul. Porthos looked at her nodding his head and said” I can see you understand what I am saying to you and that it is why it’s not just the sword that conquers but the emotions of one hearts can make a mighty man fall to the ground.”

Sommer said in a grateful and humble voice “Porthos you will always be my counsellor and protector who truly understands even the young maidens tragedies , thank you”. Porthos humbly replied “ thank you”.

French King Louis X1V was living with his Spanish mother Anne the Queen regent and his brother Philip in the Palais Royal the former home of Cardinal Richelieu. The Cardinal Mazarin was of Italian descent and once a solider before expanding his career as a Papacy diplomat. Now as France principle minister the stage was being set to groom the young Louis to be France narcissistic future king. The Cardinal secret rendezvous with the king mother Anne was secret the Pope and the French religious patrons would not tolerate. The ambition of greed and power of Mazarin confused the young king morality that shaped his mind in quest of sensual pleasures and pursuits.

The common French labourers bore the heavy burden of the monarchy opulent lifestyle and religious wars. The conflicts the young king had to carry were not just his family conflicts but the many years of civil wars between the Protestants and devout catholic’s. Also the inter marriages and alliances between the countries in Europe couldn’t stabilise peace because of the greed of kings.

The evening came when the aristocracy guest started to arrive at Porthos home for the celebration of Porthos new title. The servants were busy preparing the food and alcohol for the guest. It was was a hive of activity with the aromas of meat and garlic floating in the air followed closely by wine and French ale. Sommer decided to help despite Porthos insistence for her to rest . She wanted to show her gratitude and was looking forward of meeting the other musketeers especially Athos.

To be continued






Palais-Royal History: A Peaceful Place for Parisians

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Tip Of The Week

Oil your Brain

Oil Your Brain and body

The brain and body need vital nutrients to function to its optimum performance. If you had a ferrari on your drive how fast and how far would you be able to drive by filling the fuel tank with pure sugar? The human body is more powerful and performs at its best with the correct fuel.What does the brain and body need to be at its full potential?

There has been tremendous research on Omega-3 fatty oils vital role in supporting the body and brain. Here ia direct quote from a research paper “Nutrition has an important role in mental health as the brain relies on both macro- and micronutrients for development and functioning In particular, suboptimal levels of omega-3  polyunsaturated fatty acids (n-3 PUFA) are emerging as a potentially modifiable risk factor for mental illness. Since their discovery in the 1970s as key components of brain tissue , long-chain n-3 PUFA have been postulated to serve critical roles in brain development, and function and a lack of these fatty acids has been implicated in a number of mental health conditions over the lifespan, from developmental disorders and mental retardation in childhood, to depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia and borderline personality disorder, stress, hostility and aggression in adulthood, and cognitive decline, dementia and Alzheimer’s disease in late adulthood”. The paper was entitled Oiling the Brain: A Review of Randomized Controlled Trials of Omega-3 Fatty Acids in Psychopathology across the Lifespan by Natalie Parletta (formerly Sinn) has a PhD, Bachelor of Psychology (Honours), and Master of Dietetics. Her research focuses on nutrition and mental  health, and the role of parenting styles and feeding practices in child and adolescent diets.…

I have read the book Genius Foods by Max Lugavere about a year ago with many useful tips on nutrition. In his book mentions he mentions Omega-3 fatty oils as one ingredients to a healthy life, the mediterranean diet.The olds are found predominately in fish. That is a problem for my taste, Ever since my childhood I have never enjoyed seafood despite living near the sea. The solution I found useful by taking natural fish in capsules form. Before you make any changes to your nutrition seek professional advice as it could be detrimental to your health.

Here are some benefits have healthy omega-3 fatty oils

VISION Pexels.com
Human Body systems Pexels.com
Sleep Pexels.com
Diseases Pexels.com
Mental Health Pexels.com

Remember to oil your brain with omega-3.







The birth of a Psychopath

The birth of a healthy child is the awe of every parent. Looking at their beautiful eyes , their soft skin and their innocence face warms the heart. How does this innocent child become a threat to society by voracious killing with no remorse being reborn symbolically as a Psychopath?

The question in debate nature verse nurture? The simple truth is not straight forward from my perspective. I would say it both has an influence on the baby , child and the adult as it evolves through life. From a psychological and neuroscience reference the brain does change and evolve to adapt to the environment and nurture. The paper The reappearing psychopath: Psychopathy’s stain on future generations made two observations that I found fascinating. The Psychopath behaviour of Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD) only diagnosed at 18 years old. Personally I believe that some children form very strong characteristics before that legal age.A main ingredient of ADP is pathological lying which is a trait of a Psychopath. In the paper it noted that 42 months old children can be conscious liars. The second observation I noticed that the brains of pathological liars have a 22–26% increase in pre-frontal white matter. During adolescence the natural pruning of the brain reduces this area but in Psychopaths it remains the same. The brain evolves due to other constraints an example of access stress that again has influence on the brain development.

Another paper suggestion that antisocial behaviour in children with elevated levels of CU traits (AB/CU+ ) One marker in children with AB (Antisocial behavior) and callous-unemotional (CU) is a pattern for a potential Psychopath. The question of environment is another causality of children and adolescents with callous unemotional development. I think of a seed to grow the conditions need to be right for further growth and fruitage. There was a study of this vital question how conduct problems (CP) is fertile soil to callous unemotional problems. I quote from the research paper also reported that higher levels of CP in the child, lower socioeconomic status (SES) of the family, lower cognitive abilities, and poorer quality of parenting were associated with greater stability of CU traits. The child environment related to the family systems of unstable management and lack of resources does not help the child chances in reducing the risk of becoming a psychopath.

Psychopathy Checklist Youth Version (PCL-YV) is one tool designed to identify traits in young offenders. The list contains obvious clues of antisocial behaviour but two that stood out to me was 1:Unstable Interpersonal Relationships 2 :Failure to Accept Responsibility. Relationships are nurtured at childhood influencing the social cues of what is expected and learnt from adults. Accept responsibilities is essential for relationships to grow in any structure in society that’s in the family or community. I can’t imagine what some children have to suffer in some communities and families where love and affection is devoid and how a small child has live in such cruel environment. Reminds me of the saying how dogs reflect the personality of their owners. Aggressive dogs often learnt their behaviour. In a Similar vain the future Psychopaths responsibilities is related to the environment it was subjected to.

Another foundation for a Psychopath in training is pathological lying. We all lie from time to time. It could be your age , weight , even saying to friend you like something when you don’t. Children explore this avenue of lying , I had this experience with my 4 children and they all have done it. If you think why a child might lie is a good start to understand their world. To be a pathological and habitual liar takes practice. The many reasons why Psychopaths lie is related to their behaviour patterns. In essence the lack of emotional and cognitive empathy so they can do what they want.

In this short post it opens the doors to understanding the challenges society has in evaluating the emergence of adult Psychopaths . The birth of a Psychopath is a combination of nature and nurture in the complex world of behaviour and the amazing complex human brain.









Child environment influence behaviour

Tip of the week

Consistency is the secret not the amount that counts

Every drip of effort will get you there

The expectations in life we have sometimes have can overwhelm us due to several factors. One reason why we can’t do what we set out to do is the brain incentives in the VTA region prefers homeostasis. What that means in essence, too many expectations with no immediate rewards or incentives will reduce your drive of reaching your expectation.(cell.com)

What ever the desire is start with one small step. It could to lose weight for that special occasion. Save money for that new outfit. Write a book you had in the back of your mind. Learn a new skill improve your employment opportunities. Many great things you may want to do. There is a simple trick to help you on your road to success

  • Start the action: Regardless of the amount, 1 minute or 1 drip
  • Schedule the action: Daily , weekly , monthly
  • Stretch yourself: Take the emotion and your restrictions out of equation
  • Sustain the implementation: If you Forget or don’t do it start again
  • Start small: easy steps will gain momentum of victories
  • Stick to the goal: celebrate victories review failures
  • Strip away all negative beliefs and behaviour: It’s Your life
  • Seek other ways to accomplish your ideas: Collaborate and investigate better ways
  • Say no to what stopping the momentum

Just a few ideas to set the goal in action. Remember that achievable goals is the secret to achieving your FULL potential.

The great divide man verse woman

Who is worth more?

Religion, education , employment, family systems are just a few institutions that have separated the roles of gender in history and still persists today. I will endeavour to be neutral in this post because I know it can be very emotive for some because of past and present prejudices. We all have hidden bias and constructs about ideas again I will endeavour to be neutral about my hidden bias.

From a religious perspective God in many cultures is portrayed as masculine deity. From the governance in the religious systems it has been dominated with male leaders including priest , gurus, monks and more. The religious writings , inspirations , interpretations and teachings with conclusions are very much male dominated. The fascinating fact about the male hierarchy religious system women are generally more religious. According to one research on religious activity woman worldwide generally identify to a religious faith compared to men. The reasons why that is the case are many and varied but there is no definite evidence to say why.

Education in history has been only available to the privileged classes and because of many cultures women rights have been viewed as non negotiable. Influenced by cultural ideologies the roles women play in society has reduced their availability to education. Today “Women make up more than two-thirds of the world’s 796 million illiterate people.” according to one website. Even a basic education for young girls still are a factor especially in poor countries.

Employment is crucial for survival in many cultures but more importantly it adds meaning to a person life for many. Reflecting on your childhood ambitions and inspirations was a key factor influencing the future. My ambition as a child was to work on a boat traveling the world and being paid at the same time exploring this beautiful planet.Employment in historical terms has dramatically changed due to the industrial revolutions. Statistics worldwide shows that more women are unemployed than men. The reports shows that throughout the world women work more than men including duties in the home as unpaid work .The evidence says”women spend on average over 5 hours of unpaid care work per day, while men spend less than one hour”. I understand that reality being a single parent of 3 children at home there is always plenty to do.

Family systems are related to the previous reasons in the differences in genders. The beliefs we embrace as children or accommodate as adults influence the men verse women bias we have. The culture influences the different beliefs we assimilate. The lens of family systems shapes the actions of an individual either positively or negatively. Removing the lens of personal and family systems beliefs may reveal hidden bias with the great divide of man verse woman situation.

The personality of an individual will have an effect on what actions they take in life. There are many models explaining personality and temperaments that will effect the situation of equality in life. One interesting model that does have its limitations like most theories sheds light on what role we play in society. Carl Jung proposed several theories about personality. One theory was extroverts and introverts of personality and this will effect any relationship. The theory of Archetypes explains the patterns of a person behaviour. The Myers Briggs personality test is another popular personality test. When we explore who we are we can understand our position in society how we relate to others. Being unaware of who we are can separate the equality of men and women. Recognising that others personality will have effect on the relationships between the sexes will give you insight. Popular culture portray men as psychopaths but in reality women are capable of such behaviour. Understanding personality of people will influence our actions and behaviour towards the sexes.

In conclusion before you make any judgments about another person ask yourself an important question: Where is this judgement coming from? Do I continue to support the great divide of men and women? It could be in the family , in the work place or even with friends. A quote to consider with deep reflection will remove our partially.

Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides.
La Tzu




Gender and education


Cultural Differences in Family Dynamics