Chapter 5 The fear of emotions yours and mine

Excerpt from my book I’m writing at present called “What are you afraid of”

PHD in communication

The great concept available now is to enhance our vocabulary and our language of emotions is by what they actually mean to us and to others. The ultimate challenge with our emotional histories is to have a PHD in this exciting emotional language with receiving the diploma of emotional intelligence. With this accolade it will enhance the opportunity for success in life with meaningful relationships and greater success. The four semesters of learning this skill covers the topics of self awareness, social awareness, management operations and relationship management.

Communication on a human level is not just what we say ,it also includes what we do in our environment. For example imagine we know a very rich person who has a reputation of a frugal flamboyant business entrepreneur. We build a picture of how the person is going to act before they communicate by our perception of words and ideas. The environment dictates to a measure of how we communicate emotionally with others , popular culture can infuse new habits and attitudes. The emotional environment, includes the historical histories of ourselves that has influence on our emotional exchange mechanism in society.

In many affluent societies people are becoming isolated because of technology, work, family responsibilities and other factors. The irony in advanced civilisation there is more possibilities of connections of communication through technology. The potential connections we can have now with other individuals are superseded to any other civilisations that has lived on this planet. For example we have social media with the various platforms of Facebook ,WhatsApp ,Instagram and Twitter are just a few. People can connect all over the world from the comfort of their own personal world at any time. This is an amazing leap for mankind’s potential worldwide to be as one large tribe which could provide the needs of all the tribe. Good research article about friendship online and offline worth read. It’s says in conclusion”Finally, this study shows that for the quality of the friendship it does not matter how people met their friends, online versus offline, as long as the friendship also migrate to offline settings.”(cyberpsychology.eu) This statement may evoke you or not but this may be your only medium of friendship you have at this time.There are other ways to embrace friendships and connections with a depth of emotions that words alone can facilitate .Our endearing connections with other like-minded individuals can be achieved at another level.

The emoji living in the fantasy world

The depth and level of communication style has drastically changed in the modern world. The word emoji is two Japanese words “e” picture and “moji” character introduced in 1998.Over a hundred years before emojis, emoticons came on the scene. In 1881 a magazine published four “faces”—conveying joy, melancholy, indifference, and astonishment—and called them “typographical art(bustle.com). In 2015 ”The “Face with Tears of Joy” emoji wins the title of word of the year“—the first time a non-word has won top honors.(wierd.com) Oxford Dictionaries felt the pictograph “best reflected the ethos, mood, and preoccupations of 2015.” (techspot.com)The language of emotions has changed with the concepts of media , culture, education and with new styles.

Today there are many styles in western cultures on the way we communicate with a child, then as a teenager and then finally as an adult. Human society betrays a world of beauty in an unrealistic imaginary fantasy world. Trying to explain modern civilisation to a secret tribe in the Amazon would be strange concepts to some tribes. The television shows ,glossy magazines, Hollywood blockbuster movies and the scripts we hear in the popular culture. Society betrays the ideal perfect image of what a beautiful person should look like and be. They have to be the perfect age, The perfect height, the perfect weight and the perfect look. This barrage of the relentless media with its idealistic propaganda of perfectionism. It has a tremendous effect on everyone subconsciously and consciously.This includes the young and vulnerable and in families.I have seen firsthand the negativity of this betrayal of modern society perception of perfection and high expectations. The concept of what a beautiful woman should look like according to the media has saturated the world that we live in.

Express How you feel by words and art

The authentic inner beauty some individuals are afraid to reveal. They have an inner masterpiece of raw human emotions struggling to express into the wide world. To express how you truly feel can be very difficult and challenging. The fear is rooted of being judged with others mental concepts and ideologies. We all have formed and may of challenged these ideas from childhood experiences . To express how you really feel about yourself can be scary for many reasons. To express your real inner self with no fear of reprisals is what truly beautiful. According to the book “the fear of art”, made a very interesting statement “perfection is a trap”.(Art & Fear) I realised that I am often lurking in that trap for lots of reasons . This is a trap or mindset that I have had regarding my ability is to be a good artist and other activities I’m not perfected or mastered yet. My expectations of trying to reach the great heights like the masters Leonardo da Vinci or William Shakespeare and Mozart are unrealistic but who knows.

I’ve have read a fantastic biography of Leonardo da Vinci (by Walter Issacson) who truly was a very talented man in many aspects of his life. When I mention one of his masterpieces the Mona Lisa which is definitely a piece of art. Did you know that he never finished the Mona Lisa in his mind. Today it is displayed at the Louvre museum in Paris where millions of visitors believe it is a finished masterpiece. Several of his famous paintings, he carried with him when he moved locations because he was never satisfied what he had created on canvas. The Mona Lisa he always wanting to improve some aspects of her in his painting. The Mona Lisa was in his possession after 40 years of starting this original masterpiece when he died. We marvel at this amazing painting but he was still continuously reflecting on how to improve her The end result of his cherished masterpiece is available for the world to see. Many of his works where never completed because of his relentless high expectations and of other distractions in his life. This aspect of his mindset was ultimately fantastic because he was always seeking greater understanding and how he could deliver some iconic work. He was extraordinary in his pursuit on how to achieve his best was due to his continued learning skills and exploration.None of us are born with amazing talents as babies we develop these gifts and attributes by applying the things we have learned with the aptitude to learn and improve.

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