Anger has many negative stories attached to its legacy of violence. Anger has been used as a weapon against common friends and foes with devastating effects. Anger also is a powerful force which has a positive side. Interestingly the baby doesn’t show anger until the age of one years then it is capable of expressing it. The baby realising that it’s needs are not being met then a physiological response starts to regulate the baby brain. Heard the story of the terrible twos with tantrums and explosive fits this helps us to understand the change in behaviour.
Anger starts in the amygdala the part of the brain that navigates emotional response triggers of fear to help the body with fight or flight action. The prefrontal cortex area of the brain controls reasoning, judgment and to think logically before we take action.
There are stages of anger which are useful to understand so we can regulate this emotion. 1 Annoyance 2 Frustration 3 Hostility 4 Rage
There are 3 stages of anger 1 Beginning 2 Middle 3 End.
There is also 3 main types of anger
1 Passive aggressive
2 Open aggressive
How to cope with anger or to use anger in a positive way is a learned skill. The learned behaviour patterns we witnessed and experienced will be our internal model. The first key to manage anger is to recognise its symptoms by being self aware of our feelings and those around us. There is consensus that anger is a secondary emotion linked to sadness and fear. Noticing what triggers us or our close companions will help us to understand ourselves and those we are in contact with. Spending time after an episode of anger reflecting on what lead up to and being emotionally intelligent discerning what causes may be. Anger is an action process that when used correctly will resolve a problem or identify a problem. Google online anger iceberg under images is a great way to identify hidden causes.
A great mantra I learnt “ blame(anger) comes from pain”. Next time you or someone is angry , don’t react because anger is sign of emotional struggles within.